Tag: mentalmodel

  • PAIN VS HARM

    PAIN VS HARM

    If you want to live a life with any sort of joy or hope in it then you have to understand the difference between pain and harm. Pain is a sensation of discomfort. It can be horrible. But it is only a sensation. Harm is a shift in your existence that makes you worse or…

  • IMPROVING YOURSELF

    IMPROVING YOURSELF

    To improve yourself, you need to do the thing that makes you feel like a bad person. If you have low boundaries, you need to stand up for yourself, and that’ll feel like you’re offending people because you’re not used to saying no or telling others what you want. If you have hard boundaries and…

  • MIDDLE OF THE CURVE

    MIDDLE OF THE CURVE

    Finding your people is difficult. And we’re constantly sent signals by the people around us to be more normal. To not be so loud, and to not act so weird. But the most lonely place is in the middle of the bell curve. Because we don’t want to be around lots of people. We want…

  • EXPERIENCE DISCOMFORT TO GROW

    EXPERIENCE DISCOMFORT TO GROW

    Do something difficult in a measured way. Lots of self-development talks about how you need to experience difficult things to become a better person. But to say that without a measuring stick is stupid. You can’t just experience unlimited hard things. There are infinite problems you can choose to experience in life and if you…

  • HOW TO LEARN

    HOW TO LEARN

    Pushing yourself can be stupid. Because many people always try to be better. And most of them can’t see their actual skill level. And if you’re already trying hard and decide that you should push yourself, you won’t realize that you’ve gone beyond your limits because you’re too focused on your goal to see your…

  • IF YOU WANT TO HELP SOMEONE

    IF YOU WANT TO HELP SOMEONE

    If you want to help someone, don’t tell them five things. Tell them one. Your ego wants to tell them five because it makes you feel smart. But they need one because that’s how many things you can try at the same time to make an improvement. So if someone asks you for help, you…

  • LIMIT PAIN

    LIMIT PAIN

    When you’re a productive person with ambition there’s no end to the things you should do So eventually you have to decide you’ll stop otherwise you will only stop from exhaustion, when there is no other option and you will be consumed with guilt. Don’t make the mistake of only putting limits on your pleasure.…

  • MOMENTS OF ENJOYMENT

    MOMENTS OF ENJOYMENT

    Moments of enjoyment are rare. And there’s no particular reason to assume there will be a second moment. And people tend to dampen those joyful moments as a form of self-preservation. We don’t want to be exposed to the fact that we might be let down later unpredictably and we don’t want to face up…

  • OVERWORKING YOURSELF

    OVERWORKING YOURSELF

    When you’re overworking yourself, it’s easy to tell yourself that you’re doing the right thing. Because we want to be good. It’s easy to tell yourself that you need to work harder. Or do one more project to catch up. But the only difference that way of thinking has from telling yourself you’ll have just…

  • SEE THE GOOD IN YOURSELF BECAUSE IT’S USEFUL

    SEE THE GOOD IN YOURSELF BECAUSE IT’S USEFUL

    See the good in yourself because it’s useful. If you make nine good decisions and one bad decision you’ll probably call yourself a bad decision maker. Because we like to dislike ourselves. If you do this, you’ll make your belief come true, and make bad decisions because your picture of reality is wrong. The more…